Just a quick jaunt today to get my blood flowing- I am eager to work this morning on my writing- I have been spending the past few weeks doing a ton of THINKING about this project- clarifying my composing goals, whom to work with, what interesting ways I can share music that is brewing in me. Seems every morning I have a different epiphany about this project. It’s been refreshing and exasperating to live in this headspace- to be doing so much thinking and planning and less actual music making.
So this morning, I am wanting to get a bunch of these thoughts actually on the paper, so in the interest of time skipped a visit to the creek but got myself walking in the fresh air at least- of course my mood lifted in the crispness and warmth of the sun (why does this always surprise me?).
What struck me today was seeing my own footprints from yesterday imprinted in the grass- I’m used to seeing my footprints in the snow and ice, but to see where I had pushed the grass down and it was too frozen to spring back up in the course of a day- the image struck me- the parallel of my introspection of looking at all I’ve done the past year or so- looking at my imprints- the grass of my brain hasn’t sprung back yet. Okay, horrible metaphor, but you get the idea I hope.
The neat thing is that I turned away from the footprints, with the sun on my back, and continued on my way, mood lifting with every step. As I come back to my writing, I am struck by the ponderings of NC Wyeth (in a letter to his brother, 1908):
“What a wonderful thing life is – how exasperating! how beautiful! How hopelessly entangling is one’s mind! What a maze of sentiment, emotion, love, depression, inspiration, discouragement, hopfulness one passes through in just a few hours… It seems to me that if one’s work were going well, or simply, properly directed, that it would solve this involved state of mind, and one would think clearer, with more directness and show greater strength and steadier advancement therefrom.”
Well, I for one am excited for the coming year- I think after all this pondering and getting a clear vision of where I’m going, the flow of work and creativity that will come as a result is sure to be fun!
Jan 30, Chester County PA, temp 34F